"A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin."
-H.L. Mencken
Some wise crack said, that the world on December 21st (correct me if I'm wrong) would bring a cumshot of natural disasters and would be the end of the world, as we know it (cue dramatic background music). Now, I'm not gonna go into this, coz it would turn our heads upside down, but geez, shit does give me the creeps now that I think about it. However, now that a Mayan and a man called Nostradomus has got our invaluable attention, would now be the time to live like there is no tomorrow? So how do you live like there's no tomorrow?
Don't ask me such questions, I'm not a fucking therapist/shrink/psychologist or whatever they call them these days. That's up to you. I'm simply the clueless pornstar asking you all the questions. Why don't you rob a bank? Risky, yes, but always remember that the take is yours (unless you made some deal with the Mafia, that requires some heavy oral). Spray paint The Great Wall Of China? Okay, you may think that I'm way over my head, but no, it's a simple suggestion (even though they'll probably torture you in ways unimaginable <---that's a warning to you, Mr Banksy). Hijack a cop car? Balls of steel and my admiration to the bitch who pulls this off and gets away, of course).
Let's just say, doing these things is asking for a chance to get anally raped in some remote prison, somewhat similar to Robben Island. So let's lower the stakes for all the pussies. Ask that girl you had a crush on since 7th grade? Don't ask how, coz that's up to you (who do I look like, Dr Phil?). Take a trip to an island, preferably Zanzibar? Sounds expensive, but not really, it's worth the trip (WARNING: If you don't have someone to bang, don't go there till you find one). Play some strip poker! Lascivious? Yes, but in a game of no regrets, what's there to lose than your clothes?
It all comes down to giving the middle finger to the world, raping mother nature and fucking karma like the bitch she is...
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